Ok, admit it. Who watched the Miss Singapore Universe 2004 just now? Alright, hands up, hands up, dont be shy. I've just one question to put to you, both guys and girls : Which was more painful? Watching the sheer lack of beauty in a BEAUTY pageant (for goodness sake) or having to listen to the horrid, indecipherable English uttered from virtually every contestant ( insofar as pronounciation and enunciation goes; and don't even get me started on the answers given to those ridiculous questions! )?

I mean honestly, as if its not bad enough these women/girls think they're hot when they're not, but is this what Singapore has been reduced to? Flagrant disregard for utterance of proper English? Reasonably speaking, im not even asking for the Queen's English here. Why is it that none of my friends speak as badly? Not all are schooled in the art of precise and impeccable speech, but to hear such substandard, haphazard, jarring noise should certainly cause a brouhaha in any respectable society. Maybe they should host the pageant on Channel 8, in Chinese. Yes, i think that would definitely be better. Why conduct it in a language 99.9% of the contestants cannot speak really baffles me immensely.

Which brings me to another point. These people have no shame. Ok, some of them really have no shame. They actually showed this interview with one of the contestants, who, of course, got cut out asap. She was, in all brutallity, fat. Not that i've anything against fat people..i mean half the time we girls complain we're too fat. No, but im getting to the point. Firstly, she shouldnt join the competition. Strike one. Secondly, reinforcing my point above, she spoke very little of the language i would like to call English. Strike two. Thirdly, bringing me back to the point that she was fat, was the fact that she was not only in a bikini, once more underlining her bulging exterior, but she actually had the gall to say she eats a lot. As if we can't tell. The question put forth to her was "What preparations were taken so far to get ready for the contest?" She answered, from what i can fathom from the broken English, "Been dieting (lor) .. yar, u know, i eat a lot one you know.. yar, i really like to eat leh (yar lk i cant tell..), coz ah havta wear swimsuit then been eating a slice of bread (or in her words, brade) and 100plus then go to sleep.. very hungry but what to do? I eat a lot one lor.. really eat a lot..(Okok, stop emphasizing the point, we can see u REALLY like to eat.. A LOT)". The woman has no shame.

Seeing im on on this tangent already, i would like to point out that, to me anyway, Singlish not necessarily means bad English. I don't think people should make such a big deal over Singlish. Singlish may not be healthy, but its not deadly. All people need to do is cut out the Lors and Lahs and Hors and ta-da, you get good English. Bad English, on the other hand, is something much deadlier and lethal. Bad English would consist of bad grammer, wrong tenses, broken English, ending with prepositions, mispronounciation etc. Now that, is unacceptable.

Instead of coming down hard on erasing Singlish from the Singaporean heritage and sense of home, why not just brush up people's English? Its so much more effective and wise.

What was my point again? Oh yes, Miss Singapore 2004... ha ha ha. What a joke.