I'm so totally looking forward to Cornell now!

Saturday, went to the beach outing organised by the SSA(Singapore Students Asso. of Cornell) and it was actually pretty darn fun! We played beach vollyball - i really suck at it though - and beach frisbree and sat by the sea (how many seashells does she sell on the seashore?, spiralling into how much wood can the wood chuck chuck?), made ''sandcastles'' and talked and laughed at silly things people did. Then later we all trucked off to Jay(the president of SSA)'s house for dinner. This senior, Meng Aun(the designated driver..haha) had driven to Sentosa and was driving to Jay's so instead of taking public transport(which you all know i hate) with the rest, a few of us - Meg, Jaclyn, Brian, Alvin and i - decided to take Meng Aun's car. Well! Our desire not to take the mrt and bus led us to walking halfway across Sentosa to his car! Whereupon the 4 of us had to squash behind, while Alvin(this guy is really good with directions! even tho he doesnt drive..) was the designated navigator, to Jay's place.

Anyway, i was told Jay had a cat so i asked him about it and he told me it wasnt his and that it just stalks around outside. So, i thought, OK, i can just make a dash from the car to the inside of the house. But when we reached, the cat was INSIDE the gate!! And it was bloody HUGE!!! And Jay had also negated to tell me that the food was outside, on the porch! i.e. where the cat was. Jaclyn was so nice she got me food as i cowered indoors and the seniors and the rest were so great they came in and kept me company. Angela(who's also Jay's girlfriend), this really cool senior, actually set up the 'Baking Club' in Cornell, which we decided we were going to join! And a bunch of us have decided we're going to have a strict exercise regime. Angela and Seraphina(this other really nice senior) are going to bring us shopping(!!!) and they drive. *grin* Jay was so crafty he put the absolutely delicious cheesecake and brownies in front of us coz i made a comment about how i eat whatever's put in front of me and we kept having to shout take it away, and shove it over to the guys, who would shove it back! And in Cornell, they have "makan fest" once a year, which sounds so yummy.

Colin(this other exco member of the SSA) showed us a video of Cornell, made by his friend, The Inside Edition(!) and it was so funny and nice and how everything looked so pretty, covered in snow. The campus really really looks so totally gorgeous. The people who i've met are so fun and the campus looks so inviting and lovely, i'm really looking forward to starting a new chapter of my life in Cornell. After the video ended, there was this collective awed silence, which was the freshmen going, "wow, i really want to go", and the others going, "i miss that place". And Megan(the really cool girl from Indiana) and i really hit it off, we talk non-stop everytime we meet.

Met Micheal after that and we watched some really weird documentary on the discovery channel and i fell asleep on his shoulder. A very lovely ending to a very lovely day.

11 days to my departure..

I still cannot make up my mind if i want to become more tanned or try and become fairer. SIGH. Sun block or sun tan? Umbrella or just shades? Long board shorts or short board shorts? Baby T or Comfy T? White or Blue? Blue or Black? Black or Pink? SIGH. And my freshly French-manicured nails! I hope they don't get chipped. Well, to the beach i must go tomorrow.. Megan has made that choice for me. Was talking to Weizhi on the phone a few days ago and i muttered something like "I hate the beach!" and the dear girl says to me, utterly in shock, "But you don't even know her!". My brilliant BBQ! *grin* What would i do without all her nonsense? And i'm glad to know that's what type of person one of my best friends thinks i am! That i go around scolding and cursing people! I'm apalled, aghast... hurt beyond belief! Oh, the grief, the agony, oh, oh, my poor broken heart...! Cornell's Singapore Association thingy is holding some "Beach Orientation" thingy. And they gave a few reasons why we, as freshies, should go. The two which stuck with me were: 1) the Ang Mohs will be so jealous that we tan and not redden like lobsters and that 2)NUS and NTU shall not be the only unis that boast of going to beaches for orientation.. what more motivation does one need?

About dearest BBQ, she was so blur today, it wasn't funny - actually, it was hilarious. She kept changing and wearing her shirts the wrong way around, or she'd button up something wrongly. Aww! _____'s getting a _____!!! Ahaha..(Haw haw).. HOR?! Beeboo was a bit off her rockers today, one minute being damn high, another sulking away at her food, and Fartzy was her normal, psychotic and grumpy-when-no -one-lets-her-eat self.

Later, Josh drove me to Mikey's camp - where he's the Duty Officer for tonight again - and it was pretty darn cool 'coz he was the highest rank present so everyone had to call him "Sir" and do his bidding. (Mwhaha) Power is so attractive in a man!

Oh crud... a mere 13 days to my departure...

Today i awoke, feeling most most pleased with myself. For some reason, i just felt so refreshed! Proceeded to have an extremely satisfying lunch at Crystal Jade Holland Village (again)  with dearest Huahua - who ive decided is my "xiao long bao" partner! And what rubbish that girls giggle only when they are with their boyfriends/guys they like. I managed to giggle like hell with dearest Huahua too! Whilst this was going on, BeeBoo and BBQ(or Barbie-cute as she prefers) had "broken" into my popo's condo opposite the road and were sun tanning - or according to Zihua, "getting skin cancer".

While BeeBoo rushed home to bid on her NUS courses, the rest of us met and got chauffeured to Queensway by my brother. Whereupon my mood soured due to my inability to find a pair of shoes i liked that actually fit me. Silly Zihua managed to get a pair of shoes - its sooo unfair!!! And my brother got THREE!! Hmph..

Mikey called while we were at Queensway and he was supposed to meet us for dinner at Fish and Co but we totally forgot about the dear boy and by the time he called (and i picked up..oopss..) it was 8! And he had to go back to camp by 9 to be Duty Officer for the camp. So didnt manage to see him today. But had so much fun with my girls! Beeboo's "lack of clothes" which "didnt even get us a table upstairs", ____'s getting a ____, ____'s getting _____, _____'s getting _____, our crazy toasting to ____'s getting ____, Zihua's "puss-in-boot"'s eyes at Beeboo, flipping for a 20cent coin, laughing until the entire place looked at us, the million tartar sauces, refills of water, the self-proclaimed "magical" pan that was always refilled with rice, the mass sharing of food - hands reaching all over the place, the communal centre pan where all the food maraculously ended up, the yummy yummy yummy rich chocolate fudge cakes, the inflatable 'me's in different positions for different occassions, the waitress with the HUGE smile, the sickeningly sweet message(heh heh.. hor?!)...in a flash, the night was over and Fish and Co was already closing. I love my girls so much!! We have so much fun together that time is really not an issue. Oh man, i really think i'm getting a tad sentimental since im going in exactly

14 days... 

How is it while other people tend to lose weight on their boyfriends' requests/after getting attached, i am managing to do the exact opposite? Micheal, i am sure, is habouring a nasty ploy to fatten me up. Considerably. I'm convinced he's trying to get me so huge that no one else will find me attractive!! Conspiracy thereom, i say! He's been bringing me to eat/preparing me the most extensive fares. After an extremely heavy, and very satisfying popiah session with my family prepared by my dearest popo yesterday, he brought me to have supper - satay near the esplanade...then holland village for some late night dim sum. And today, i was treated to a startling array of foods at his place...from dumplings to naan and curry to crepes to dim sum to pasta and pizza to sushi and sashimi to cake and 'mikey's-home-made-ice-cream-bread'..he'd gotten almost all my favourites..was i in any position to reject? I think not! And we settled to eat in the most unbecoming fashion, on the floor no less(!), whereupon i forced him to watch "Kuai Le Yu"(some Chinese 7 O'clock show) with me. He claims its all to make up for the time when i couldnt eat properly due to my swelling, in conjuction with my eating all my favourite foods before i leave. A likely story? I think not! And how he insisted i finish the last dumpling because he "knows i love it"..."no, no", he denied, "its the truth", he lied, "i only want you to be happy"...pshaw...Sneaky fellow!

15 days to the fateful day...

My Many Loves...

I must say, i really do love Cuixian's house! Do you know the girl has over seventy bottles of nail polish?! AND a ka-zillion tiny bottles of perfume!! We took a break from mahjong and dearest cuicui gave both Anna and i French manicures, much to Zihua's disdain. Seriously, ive never seen anyone sulk SO MUCH before in my life...just because she wanted to continue playing...and the way that girl managed to watch 2 of her Chinese soap operas(each more dramatic than the other), by switching channels back and forth every 2 seconds, so that im sure she doesn't know the plot of either one of them, really amazes me. Of course what's a mahjong session without much food(courtesy of Cui) and Zihua trying to commit suicide by holdin her breath(the funniest thing since Seinfield)? Zihua was apparently trying to cure her hic-cups by gulping in a huge mouthful of air and holding it in, which Anna(brilliant! i totally love her for this!) decided was Zihua trying to kill herself, leading me to collapse upon the floor with laughter. I love the carry bags Cui's mom gave us too, especially the hot pink one! What a lovely lovely day!

And i love the library!! (ha! never thought you'd hear me say that one, did ya? lol) Did you know you can borrow magazines from there? All types?! Like In Style, Fitness, Elle, Movieline, Seventeen... Country Decoration and Martha Stewart Home(HEH). I love the library!

Of course we all know how much i love mahjong!!

And i love the time i spend with Mikey. The crappying around, the movie shoulder, the hand to hold, the dancing with ice cream in the middle of orchard at night, all the silly small things.... How stupid to get back together so soon before i leave... how bloody stupid.  

17 days to my departure...

"Hi, i'm alicia and im a shopoholic."

Shit. FOUR days of "non-shopping" has really unleashed the psycho-shopper in me. On Tuesday, minutes before i was dragged across the road kicking and screaming, for my massive teeth-extraction, i managed to fleetingly carass a few rackful worth of clothes at Benetton. Since then, ive been in hiding due to the swelling. Well! Sunday saw me meeting my dear Weizhi(who henceforth will be affectionately known as BBQ, for reasons best known to herself) and Beeboo, after Sunday brunch(more on that later on)..and boy did we shop! I must admit, i went a little crazy, practically buying everything i laid my eyes and hands on, eventually leading to BBQ's remark that i "buy things very fast ah". But i'm very happy. Very very very happy. With all my purchases and my day. And my life.

The reason why i love my Beeboo and my BBQ so much is that we indeed are meant to be the best of friends. More than the obvious of having a damn shit good time together, we really can shop and eat! We even mapped out a very strategic "shopping plan" which maximised our shopping and our pleasure! Though Mango failed us, we still made it to the last pit-stop, Cine, and left happy and late. With my convincing and Beeboo's ideas, we could make the water and ripping idea work..*wink wink*..nose bleed and vomitting~ And i'm so shit sorry i got the both of them yelled at for me sort of 'taking' someone else's cab! Well, i maintain we were standing before them!!

Anyway, i have to say i'm really contented with my life right now. While just a while ago, everything seemed to be going against me, everything seems to be going my way of late. (No, i do not see the connection to my getting back together with Micheal...) I just wish that somehow i could have a little more time in Singapore. More time to spend with ma' girls BBQ and Beeboo, shopping, eating, laughing, just being us..more time spent playing mahjong with my singing Fartz and all my kakis...more time cuddling and being crappy with Mikey...more time doing ridiculous things, clubbing, bowling, badminton, fun with the Tooties...more time kidding around and chuckchuck(!) with Josh and Turtle, with DeWei, Jude, Daniel...more time partying with Sean, Kerr, Hon, Ice...more time getting manicures  and spa treatments with Tammy and Corny..more time fighting with Elf..more time mashed up with Aaron and David..much more time with my Popo..more time with my family at dinners, laughing and joking...more time for ktv, mambo-nights, stay-overs and sentosa outings with Clar, Dawn, Qin..more time for nydc battle-against-the-mushroom-ham-rice gossip sessions with Dash..more time for sari, toga and Bollywood parties with the rest of the crazy gang..more time...just a little more time? But yet i really am yearning to go. A connundrum, i suppose. But couldn't be more satisfied with the way my life is spanning out now. 

***

Oh and now about lunch. Went for the usual Sunday brunch with the folks, the bro and the grand-dudes..and throughout the 8 course lunch, even through the sharks fin and all the other geat stuff, all i really wanted to sink my teeth into was the xiao long bao. That Xiao Long Bao. But as i happily bit into the blasted thing, it sorta got stuck on my lip, so i tried to open my mouth wider to shove it in, but as we all remember, my jaws are still sore and swollen and i couldn't open my mouth wide enough. So the entire lovely, juicy, five-dollar a piece xiao long bao fell, SPLAT, right on the floor, in an unrecognizable mess. N-O-O-O!! And by that time, everyone had finished eating theirs so no one could give me theirs!! Oh, the injustice!

18 days left to my departure...

I think my mouth has swollen to three(or as i would now say, "twee") times its size. With the unwanted visitor(glares at josh) on wed, mahjong with the girls on thurs, mass psychosis with the tooties followed by much fast talking and gossip and desserts and more gossip and startling revelations with a01d + company(!) on fri, my mouth, lips, chin and gums have certainly taken a beating.

Kaixuan asked me a very interesting question yesterday: do i ever regret not going to Hwa Chong instead? (OK, all RJ ppl start gasping really loudly and start shouting protests like NO, NEVER, WHAAAT?!)..and truth be told, i think i have thought about it..like once. But i merely brushed it off. Seeing my dearest rowdy crowd of rubbish-makers yesterday, made me realize that i indeed would not have traded goin to RJ one bit. I loved RJ - Maybe not a certain Mrs. H. Tan - but i loved the experience none the less. And though it is is fact that most of my friends went to HC, as for all the people im really close to now, the bonds of friendship lasted through not going to the same JC. And that has made all the difference. Isn't life about meeting new people and having new experiences? Isn't it about experiencing different scenarios and taking on new things? If i had gone to HC, it be the same people as Nanyang and Chi High. Sure, i'd know more people walking around school, but in the end, what's the point? Its like double dipping!

Anyway, this entry is more about me turning into a potential alcoholic. My parents, especially my father, are convinced that i am a budding alcoholic. You see, i simply love love love, glasses of all types. Especially martini glasses!! But i love wine glasses, white and red, shot glasses, brandy glasses, champagne glasses, long stem, short stem, you name em, i love em. Maybe not so much the crass-er beer glasses/mugs, but i love all alcoholic glasses! But, lucky for them, i am not a very big drinker. I can hold my own, but i'd never really drink till i vomit unsophisticatedly and very unlady-likely all over, or until i have to stagger around, blurting nonsense. So, and this is something Jude likes to laugh at me about, i use the wine glasses, shakers, shots and martini glasses to drink water and soft drinks with. And i told my mom that there's absolutely no need to worry about me and frat parties or parties of any other type in Cornell because i find drinking out of plastic red cups most uninteresting and unrefined- be it heavily laced fruit punch or not. It just takes the joy out of it all.

Of course i intend to take wine tasting for one of my courses in Cornell. Isn't it wonderful to get credits for something as inane and fun as that?!



19 days left to my departure..

Since today i was still in hiding, i had yet another mahjong day! Was practically bundled from my house to the car to my popo's place and only my dearest Weizhi, Beeboo and Fartzy Wartzy saw me in my swelled-up state. Lucky things!



Fartz and I hiding behind the nice new shawl i got and which Fartz promptly used and dirtied!



Yes, we are pigs..the 4 of us digging into a tub of Zihua's choice of ice cream.. heh



i absolutely love these photos of WZ, BB and Zihua..cept they're ripping my poor shawl apart!! :)



Zihua arranging my mahjong tiles to be photographed..such nice tiles i had!



I maintain I WON with such a beautiful hand!

Actually dunno what i'd do if i'd never met these 3 psychotic babes of mine. Zihua with her weird communistic-cum-gu-dai-songs-that-no-one-has-ever-heard-of, Beeboo with her lovely temperament and Weizhi with her rubbish sayings and one eye big, one eye...heh. Im glad u gals shared my pain(literally!!) and though i'm damn sure you people made my swelling worse, it was all worth it. And whilst i was playing today, i had yet another epiphany! (yeah, seem to be having lotsa these of late) - Mahjong is all about making choices!! (Not life, ok, Weizhi?) Who wants 2 calorie tic tacs?? Of course Mikey was a total dear as usual and let me whine and grumble to him about the swelling and the soreness of my gums, when Zihua refused to sympathize!

And im really looking forward to Cornell now. Last Saturday, i met with a whole group of Cornellians, from freshies, like yours truly, to sophomores and seniors, and i've got my mahjong kakis already! Also, i met this really cool girl called Megan who's my official shopping buddy! She's ethnically Chinese, but she's adopted and she's been living in Indiana with her Caucasian parents. She's visiting Singapore so she decided to join the group and im glad she did. So, with mahjong and shopping taken care of, i'm all set!!

I'm the bloody chipmunk!! Thanks, huh, Josh. The idiot took the pic..and is currently forcing me to put it up. (he's got my bear hostage) Idiot!! But thanks for visiting me~ and thanks for all the concerned phonecalls from you people wondering if i can still talk and that i haven't concussed from the pain. Can you see me trying to smile? Well, its bloody sore like crap! Been eating soft food.. feel like a blinking baby. SIGH. And i keep dribbling!!(like Joanie!!) So much stuff awaiting me, so little i can eat! Even ice cream is too difficult to eat(qinqin, you tricked me!). *bawl*

AND JOSH, GET AWAY FROM ALL MY THINGS!!! I'm telling Mikey! Idiot!! Turtle, take your pet in hand, will ya! (and by pet i mean Josh, and by hand i mean discipline him! not well, yeah..oh man, i can tell you're taking it rather dirtily..sicko!)

Now i know why i can't be a doctor. I actually cried, and these, my friends, were real, 100% genuine tears, when i had to spit out a mouthful of blood today.

Finally did the deed and got my four, yes f-o-u-r, wisdom teeth extracted today. I was so freaked about it and Micheal was such a babe he offered to take leave and come lemme dig my fingernails in his hand just in case it hurt. But i had my mom for that. Throughout lunch, i was trying to convince my parents to collaborate with the dentist and nurses so that as soon as i walk in through the doors of the clinic, they could pounce on me, catch me out of surprise, and jab me with the sedation stuff! No luck there. So my dad dropped us off and i was reclining and fretting like mad in the surgical room whilst my mom talked to the dentist for such a long time that i actually managed to fall asleep even before sedation. When the good doctor walked in, i was seriously almost falling off the dentist chair..good pose, huh. My dentist really really looks like a very pretty chipmunk, a collector's item doll. He's so funny!!

Anyway, so he said to me, "You ready to be sedated?" and i went "NO!" and in a flash, he wrapped something round my arm and jabbed something into my right hand; someone else shoved a pulse counter into my left 3rd finger and he declared, "Well, then you never will be!" *i blanked out* When i came to, i was vaguely aware that my upper left wisdom tooth was being drilled, broken and yanked out. You have no idea how much i whined and moaned!! And the dentist had to go "last tooth!" .. i'm sure i fainted again.

Was totally fine when everything was over tho'. In fact, i was kinda high from all the erm, drugs. Started talking nonstop to my mom and the nurses and was walking all over the place(it was quite funny cause they were trying to prop me up wherever i went; i was suppoed to be kinda groggy i guess)getting magazines and trying to convince my mom to stop my dad from bringing the car round and that we should just go shopping!! Haha.. apparently when my bro did his, he sat there laughing and joking with the nurses for a damn long time, one of my cousins tried to throw the nurse out the window(!! hilarious story if u ever wanna know) and Mo just passed out. My subconscious, apparently, was all about the shoppin'!! (Mwahaha..oh, come, like tt's a complete surprise..)

Anyway, so i went back home, not happy i wasn't allowed to go shopping, checking out the "damage" to my face in the car mirror and talking garrulously to one and all - i.e. my mom and dad. Bearing in mind, both my upper and lower jaws and my lips were numb so much so that i could barely be understood. That really didn't stop me one bit, apparently. Then went back to sleep till around dinner time. By that time, the drugs had sorta worn off and as usual, i was most grouchy about being woken up. And then the horror! I got up and had to spit out the cotton swabs that were used to stop the bleeding and in doing so, i spat out 2 extremely bloody cotton swabs in line with some coagulated blood. Whereupon, i started crying and my popo had to come in and try and calm me down. Of course, by this time, my mom was there telling me not to be such a crybaby and u could hear my brother laughing and my dad trying to make himself useful. Hence, i can't be a doctor! Well, also i hate sciences. Throughout dinner, my mood lifted tremendously. Gonna miss my daily family dinners! We eat for like 2 over hours and just talk nonsense. The whole time they were, especially my brother, making me laugh and i was going "hahaha.. ouch!! ..haha.. dammit.. ouch..!!" which only fuelled them somemore. Shit i just realized i am gonna miss my fam!!!

Micheal dropped by ard 1-ish seeing i wasn't asleep and brought me yoghurt(marigold aloe vera! Thanks babe, have been looking for that everywhere) and a bag of nuts since i told him i would become a chipmunk. Not that i could eat the nuts of course, but it was painfully funny. He saw me in all my splendor - swollen jaws, glasses, early stages of rebonded hair and pink PJs with a blue monkey robe, holding my bolster! I'm so so so happy he's back! :)
 
23 days left to my departure~

Ah, so ive successfully managed to contradict myself once again. Yes, i do like to, so! As most of you/all of you should know, i tend to say one thing and do the other. Not that firm and unyielding, are not my beliefs, nor are my convictions. Not that im weak. No, no, not at all. I stand up very resolutely for all my beliefs and my opinions. Just that i tend to change them very swiftly and unexpectedly too. Case in point, my last cellphone, i got after i forcefully told Beeboo what a terrible model it was, how bad it looked, and how it was a large phone parading as a small phone and how it looked like a block of wood. Yet, i bought it. And fell in love with it no less. Then of course, i lost it and bought a Sony Ericsson, although i had convinced everyone Samsung was the only way to go. Indeed. Recently, my brother told me aimlessly one day that if i ever was to get perfume, to get Hugo Boss Women, because guys dig it. I rolled my eyes at him, shouted something like i smell damn good already, then went to ask around if it was really true. Josh, Karl, Jude and Damien gave the heads up. I rolled my eyes at them too. A few days later, i slinked off to buy a bottle(well! that was certainly fun! Squirting stuff all over the place, flicking stuff onto our faces no less..). And subsequently Melvin told me i smelt nice.

Ah, bottom line? I find myself quite mercurial. A bad thing? Who knows? Who really cares? One minute i may be all for something, but the next, if you find me doing something else, just know that its me. So the gist of the whole thing is, my off-again-on-again relationship with Micheal is on-again. Yes, even though i promised that my next boyfriend would be within the 168-175cm range and i would really like him. Well, i think i really do like Mikey. Anyway, yes, so that's that. And yes, you heard it from me, here, so don't go saying you didn't know or whatever. It'd be your own fault you didn't read my blog and take an actual interest in my life. So there! But then again, if you are reading this, then, urm, you should know so that doesn't apply to you, but it u arent, then don't be surprised/unhappy if i didn't tell you..crap, im not making sense..Forget it..

24 days left to go... noooo... wheeee!

WOW! So i'm REALLY going off..i'm FINALLY and REALLY going off.. *pinches self*..ouch...Wow. In 25 days, i'll be gone. I just realized. Wow. That's kinda fast. Gone, gone with the wind... wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Alright, i'm not high, i promise (Not yet anyways..)! Well, yeah, so in 25 days, i will be on my way to New York and then after a while of bumming around aka SHOPPIN'(!!) in NYC (Manolo Blahniks and Jimmy Choos here i come!), i will be off to Cornell. A full-fledged Cornellian Cow! Woohoo!

Oh crap.. 25 days.. oh crap oh crap.. but so fun so fun.. but so soon so soon.. and oh..my friends, my life, my dearest popo..my bumming around.. oooh..25 days.. shit, that's less than a month(congrats Einstein, you figured that one out..) So much to do, so little tiiime.. But i can't wait! Need to pack, need to play mahjong like there's no tomorrow, need to laugh AT all my friends again before i leave, need to do my darn essay and find out abt the maths test, need to shop shop shop, need to hurry up and get my golf P.C., need to sleep, need to eat up all the dim sum i can before i go, need to need to need to!

Oh talking about needing to, i need to pee. All this excitement has made my bladder a little weaker. And tomorrow i will become a chipmunk! Gonna get all four of my wisdom teeth removed. (Ha Ha i do not find it in the least bit amusing for all those of you who told me i'm getting what little wisdom i have removed..hmph..so there! *pouts*) Boohoohoo.. so i'll be out of action for a while.. except of course for the lucky few who i will be actively playing mahjong with!! If you can't bring Ali to the outside world, then the outside world will just have to be brought to Ali! (Yes, and i do mean me, not Muhammad...Ali..)

***

Oh and i rebonded my hair and i look so bad and stupid Micheal (aww sorry but he is silly!) is coming over later so im panicking wondering what im gonna do about the flatness of my hair!! Hair Spray and hair gel are my saviours, ive decided!! Figured since im gonna be looking like a chipmunk after tomorrow, and laying low for a while, might as well get my hair done too!

About rebonding, whilst i was sitting in the salon, i was kinda bored(since ive read almost all the magazines already) and i was brought back to last yr.. just before prom when i was getting my hair done and Micheal was sitting there with me for 3-4 hrs just entertaining me and i was so erm, entertained(?) and it was nice and i wasn't bored..Silly stuff..silly silly stuff..im rambling anyway...and i realize i don't call him "Mikey" anymore...

Curry for dinner! Yum! My mom, i'm happy to announce, has steadily progressed from abysmal cook to not bad to a few specialty dishes to wonderful cook! And by "cook", i mean, she tells the maid what to do. And apparently Cornell has really good food, seeing that they have an actual hotel and everything, which is so bad because then i'll go and put on more weight and so sorry Weizhi and Beeboo cause when you see me i'll be diet! diet! again.. and THAT pair of Levi's jeans.. haha...

And one of my toilet lights is flickering like something out of a very bad horror movie! i keep forgetting to tell someone about it so we can get the electrician to come change it. Oh man, it started this morning when the maid was cleaning my toilet and throughout the day, everytime i use the toilet, i remember. Better do something about it now in case in the middle of the night i scare myself half to death and i have to call up De Wei again (ah ha..remember the last few times?) I seem to keep scaring myself in the middle of the night, yet im never able to sleep before 3a.m. Ah well.

Well, its so back to primary school. Can you believe, my mom grounded me? During my holidays no less! I mean, ain't that quite a bloody feat? Apparently i can't go out till i finish my damn essay. Bloody F-ing great. Cornell has this damn essay all incoming Freshies need to write - Franz Kafka's "The Trial". And its only to be of 1 - 2 pages long.. i don't see what's the big fuss! I could write it in 10 minutes flat dammit.. ugh.. but that mother of mine has to build up so much hype about it...now, if only i could just remember where i put it so i could read it and do the damn essay...

Anyway, luckily my parents have no idea what "to be grounded" means. My mom managed to entertain me for 20-odd minutes yesterday. The berating began when she was driving me to the MRT station and continued as she called me on my cell and "entertained" me somemore from Buona Vista to City Hall, whereupon she put down the phone. Then she called again using our home phone line and continued to sing in my ear for one more stop to Dohby Ghaut. All in all, a very fruitful trip. Some fellow was so afraid of me that he actually vacated his seat for me. Now, that, i must say, was an extremely nice and wise gesture! He was still standing when i got off. Back to the point, so she told me i was grounded till i finish the essay. But today, she tells me i'm always going out, i'm going out tonight, tomorrow, and she rattles my plans off for next week, so when am i gonna do my essay and maths for the maths placement? See! So i can still go out!

What utter rubbish!!

***

Oh, and this hair product Lucidol.L, which Beeboo and i picked out yesterday really does seem to work! (Hooray) My hair is more manageable already.

This going out to my favourite Beauty Queen..so pretty! I will be your undying fan and love you and your crazy antics forever. Sorry i didnt pick up the phone when you needed me and sorry i won't be here, in Singapore, to see you win the title, but u are my true blue beauty queen!!

XXXX
muah!

Today was badminton day with the toots..supposed to meet at holland V at 1p.m. but i overslept and woke up at 2p.m. instead(heh). Blame Josh and Turtle..got home at 6 a.m..after mahjong at Fartz's met the boys for some chuckchuck(!). Rushed down to Temasek Club by 3p.m. and we had 3 hrs of badminton. Shinglei really left an impression with her 'precious serves' - so precious that they go over the net, to the right side of the court once in a blue moon! But the Cabbagetutus still managed to kick some Chocolateshitzzies' asses. Cherie tried to do another flashing thingaling, aided by Joanie(who else?). Slow proved once again that mere existence alone is not enough to be considered a human and soon we were off on another life-threatening adventure in Cherie's car.




Shing's "precious serves" and Cherie's flashing past..



Joanie and I forever acting spas. :)



Cant believe Joanie's pigging out on the floor! And doesnt the coke in the cup look like a toilet bowl? Eeew..



Racket power and the Musical Us.

Woah..just realized how blue everything looks!

Dinner was certainly a very spicy affair then talked to my dearest Beeboo for a bit. Then Micheal. We finally talked and we finally had a good, long, proper, heart-to-heart. I guess he knows where im coming from and he understands all that i told him. Maybe the two of us will never get back to the place where we were before, but for now, i'm just happy he's still in my life.

Oh my goodness! Okay, so i dance out of the house at around 1.30a.m. in my favourite black suede Anne Klein boots and lovely new white A/X skirt, feeling all nice and pretty and tall to meet Micheal. And when i get back, i simply cannot take off the bloody left boot!! So i sit around and try and pull down the zip - which, being my bloody boot, was stuck - for like 15 minutes, panicking and getting more and more irritated as the time passes. Micheal calls and i whine like hell and the darling boy offers to drive back to my place and help me yank off the offending boot. Luckily(heave sigh of relief here), i manage to get it off..finally. I seriously thought i might have to sleep in my left boot and have my mom help me get it off in the afternoon(well, it will be when i wake up). How absolutely traumatising my morning has been. On the plus side, i've finally watched Mean Girls.

Oh so bloody pretty! The big mahjong set and the small.. aww..



Cuicui doing the dishes.. sadly she didnt pass the "gold standard" set by Fartz's mom
so Fartz had to wash em again.. tut tut.. heh



Could Fartz be any happier? Food AND mahjong!



Cui and i, Fartz is blanked out because she decided she doesnt look good here so she abused me into "taking it down" - i did..in my own way!, Nic and i - where i managed to cut off half my face, and Nic n i - with my whole face!

Us at the HSBC Youth Seminar - i know its kinda blur, but i really love my legs in that one! (Ask to see the real photo so u can see how nice my leggies are for yourself..mwahaha)

***

The Grand Movie Marathon.. managed to watch 6ish movies practically one after the other..just tt silly Fartzzy fell asleep! And Shu n i talked rubbish while the Heat Generator itself was emitting heat furiously!



Acting silly..getting ready for our shows - all in glasses n sleepytime wear - we all look like shit, but hell, we had a good time!



We for Waffles, We for Waffles! Shu n i show school spirit while Fartz n i try to make a pair of feet.

I have a dear friend, Fartz, who likes to constantly instill fear and desperation in me. She is a dear, dear friend, yes, that she is. And the latest thing she's put into my very pretty head is the terrible notion of Eternity. A-sitting we were, at Long John's Silver, tucking into our juicy fish and scrumptious fries, when she turns to me and proclaims, "Eternity!"
"Eternity?" I venture.
"Eternity!" She replies.
What else could i do, but go "Eternity!!"
And there we sat, sprouting "Eternity" sporadically, through mouthfuls of food(and chili sauce) and in-between trying to keep up proper conversation with BB and Weizhi.

Then, of course, we came to the conclusion that Eternity totally blows! A life time of knowing you'd never die? A long, straight road of always knowing you'll be happy and safe and nice and pretty and never grow older?! Oh, oh, unhappy days! I mean, usually, Eternity signifies bliss and happiness, but as Christians/Catholics believing in Eternal Life after death and going to heaven where all things are bountiful, beautiful and gay(well, you know what i mean..), wouldn't that be rather er, monotonous? Boring? Uninteresting? So i could play mahjong all day everyday.. i could shop till i drop all the time..i could eat all the good food in the world and still keep a lovely figure..all the boys in heaven will be gorgeous and kind.. But after a while, wouldn't that be just plain drab?! Part of living life to the fullest is the part of you knowing that one day it might just all come to an end..the element of fear and mystique..of never knowing when's your last day..isn't it? Isn't it?

Well, no. Actually, now Heaven and Eternity seem rather appealing. Goodlooking boys 24/7? Shopping around the clock? Eating like hell and never getting fat? Your friends and family always in a good mood? Nobody on your case? Running around free as hell? Hell, yeah! I mean, er, hell no! I mean.. bring it on! Heaven and Eternity.. woohoo.. i'm coming for thee! Well, of course if you'd take me..

Shit. I've just realized ive become one of those people Sean, Jeremy and i used to diss and make fun of. I've actually taken to writing almost-daily entries in my blog. Today, i decided to read back what i wrote..and i realize that this blog of mine has progressed from a joke and a way to procrastinate and pass time, to one where i pen my thoughts and feelings. People, of late, have remarked that i've suddenly become "chim" and i make less sense(if that's even possible). And yes, i admit i have become a little depressive and reflective of late. Definitely quite PMS-sy. I'm sorry if ive pissed anyone off this last week or so as well..i don't want to (yeah, this time it isn't intentional, truth be told) but i've been rather agitated at a few people of late and i'm sorry. I really have no wish to hurt friendships. I think ive been lashing out randomly since my life's not been going the way i would have wanted it to.

I think i've always been rather a happy person. Weizhi has commented many times how happy i always seem (especially nearing my birthday!)..yet i think happiness is more a state of mind than anything else. Sean, too, likes/liked to tell people i am the 'happiest person he knows'..and yes, i believe i am a naturally happy person. So now, no more depressive mambo-jumbo! Alicia is back! A sudden revelation has parted the clouds and cleared the storm. Alicia is back!

And going back to the time where i had "What is a blog?" splashed over my erm, blog.. i have finally realized what a blog truly is. Its an online diary. Stupid as it sounds, written down in words, it is indeed an online diary. And i applaud the person who came up with this idea. As a child, i thought it'd be a romantic and novel idea to keep a diary. With a lock and key and all that. But i never could keep at it, no matter how hard i tried. Never could continue writing. So all my diaries , yes, i think i accumulated around 11 or 12, all had 1 or 2 entries in them. But its great that ive found a way to collect my thoughts and keep memories. We may have had fun times in our lives, but to be able to re-read your entries, years from now, and relive those memories, is treasure enough.

So, i've now come to love my blog. And its become almost a part of me. It is a private blog. A blog where i can update my friends about my goings on and share with them my thoughts and joys. So if you have my blog address, given by yours truly, know that you are special and i always want you to be part of my life.

***

Its not about the riches you accumulate over your lifetime (though that definitely is an added bonus!!) .. its about the friendships you forge over time. And you can quote me on that. In this past week, i think i've changed. In my thoughts and my perceptions. Now, i look more for what a guy has to offer emotionally than financially. The romantic in me has finally burst out. And only if the guy appeals to me emotionally, will i delve into another relationship. And that's a promise i make to myself. Till then, i will be happy admist my friends and family. And most importantly, i will be at peace with myself. Today, i break up with my 'boyfriend'(if he can so be called). Free myself from the chains of the 'relationship'(if that so can be called). Expel the ghost and wash myself clean of pretences and disguises, of hiding behind a false sense of security.

Its strange how certain people impact your life. Over the past few days, i've learnt a lot, both of myself and of other people. The HSBC Youth Seminar brought with it much laughter, sleep(caught on camera!), self-reflection, obligation and interaction. I met rich kids from all over - Thailand, Indonesia, Taiwan, Hong Kong. And by some weird connection, we shared, we learnt, we lived. From these people, i got my priorities in check; i broadened my horizons. I lived and let live. Though i might never see or actulize meeting up with any one of them again, i've seriously learnt so much. I've watched how people interact; what makes them tick. I feel more in tuned somehow, like a new "me" just itching to burst out.

I can't wait for Cornell. A fresh start, a clean slate. The "Meet the President of Cornell" cocktail party, the lunch with a Cornell kid, new people, new adventures, a different life ahead. This past week has been meeting people non-stop..hectic but so much of a rush. I don't intend to dump the old, but the potential new seems so appealing.

And i don't hate a certain someone. I think i finally figured him out. And its totally cool and nice and sweet. So if ever i am bored or free, i know who to give a call. He makes darn good company, but not as good a chase. I finally figured out who he really is and i'm totally down with that. These few days has taught me there's so much more to life. Family, is most important. Who else makes you tick? Interaction with people is a fine art, and im learning more and more. I hope to find many more good friends in life, who will carry me through the years. My closest friends, here in Singapore, we shall always remain. Our lives, entwined in a circle, so even if we stray, we remain interlinked, together and forever.

These few days have made me change the way i feel, the way i look at certain things. Im more at ease with myself right now, i think, more than ive ever been. I think ive grown in confidence and by some unspoken maturity. This experience has been really great. Its taught me believing in someone is possible and i don't have to shun away. To stop hiding behind certain disguises, i know i make myself more vunerable. But as i was taught, bigger risks bring back bigger returns. The more you invest, the more you can hope to get. Of course there's the element of chance, of the great unknown. But that makes it so much more fun somehow, like living life on the dangerous side. Life, to me, before this, had become almost monotonous, drab without much feel. Now, i look out at the world, i stretch and feel the zest consume my entire length.

Here's waiting for August.

Today i walked and walked and walked. Then i ran.

First was the shock. Then came the pain. The unbearable nagging feeling. In my 6 inch heels, i walked hazyly along, almost in a state of disorientation. My friends - all, in a moment, scattered; deserted me. But of course they weren't to blame. My useless BF stuck in camp, Beeboo with her fare-well dinner. Weizhi was teaching tuition and Daniel was with Corny. I myself didnt meet Joan as planned, and Seng was in orientation camp. Sheryl provided minimal comfort, while Fartz gave none at all. Shuyi made a feeble attempt, Josh didnt pick up his phone. Turtle tried in vain and De Wei was in the jungles. With Jem and Sean, out of bounds, i knew i was defeat. Anyway, its funny how your closest kin, can cause you so much worry. I didnt want to go home, didnt want to face my parent's interrogating, searching eyes. Why is it the one made so clear to them, is the biggest jerk of all? (Yet, when i reached home, the sight of my parent's seemed to help me smile and laugh again)

In my 6-inch heels, i trudged, from Jelita back to my house. By some mysterious force, i knew i needed a walk. The taxi uncle made a swerve, and almost killed us both. As i walked on and on, my feet no longer bothered me. Instead, questions flooded my mind as i tried to induce myself to cry. Not a tear rolled down my cheek. Then, I don't know what induced me so, but i decided to give it one last go. I'm not sure why i called you either but i'm sure i was expecting the least support from you. Yet you provided me the most comfort, in my dreary mood. The evening jog from my place to holland V, the pitstops, water, milk and the gift of black and white M & Ms warmed my very soul. Sitting in Starbucks, you heard my woes, my feelings and my thoughts. We enacted with the "peddled M&Ms" and shared many laughs. Sometimes, it may be better to bare your soul to one who knows not much of you, but still cares all the same. Thank you so very much, for all the night-long company. And for future evening romps and holland V., i still have your 6 dollars. ;p

You who caused me much more than friend, and doctor, shame on you. Shame. On. You. You irk me so. Your rudeness, incompare. I detest your seemingly cool exterior, your heart of charcoal black. Your very name, that should be nice and sweet, now sends shivers down my back. You stupid, moronic, asanine, peasant. You brainless cow. You evil, nasty, hairy goat. I hate thee so!

Revenge is the sweetest dish. Oh and how saccharine sweet my revenge shall be. Makest thee, infatuate. Makest thee, bow in disgrace. Just wait. Just wait. I will makest thee grovel in dispair. I will makest thee taste great grief. Overpowered, underequipped, you shall feel the pain. I doubt myself no more. Rest and refuel, i shall be reborn. You retarded turd, you wall of nothing great. You bad-luck-charm, you selfish bastard, you sea of the great divide. Hark thee, for i will return, powers in tact, to strip you of all dignity. You senseless, faceless, dimwitted, dunderheaded chimpmunk.

I absolutely love my friends!!
They are so... brilliant!

***

"Has he not already cost me a husband? and you, a friend and doctor?"
-Fartz

***

"Its not the money, its the principle!"
- Weizhi

***

"Don't worry kids, i'm on the train."
- Sengyat

***

"The weather is damn shiny today huh"
- Beeboo

***

"M M M"
- Seng

***

"Laughter causes indigestion, heartache and death in some. Beware."
- Jude

***

"You will grow to love the pain."
- Turtle

***

"Rumble rumble rumble"
- Weizhi

***

"Poke poke"
- Weizhi

***

"Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep"
- Joshua

***

"Sorry, i wasn't with my handphone..okok..!"
- Qinqin

***

"I am the overlord of all that's mine. Pyramids of crap, hills of insanity and buckets of liquid gold-en Gee whizz...!"
- De Wei

***

"Not if i push you first!"
- Kyle

***

"Whaa..?"
- Corny

***

"And that's what you get when the cookie crumbles..on you.."
- Elf

***

"I am a lean, mean, sex-mo-chon-dri-aaaccc"
- Elf

***

"All hail the Elfin king"
- Elf

***

"Do you think i could take em?"
- Daniel

***

"I swear i will swear at you if you do..i swear.."
- Turtle

***

"Boogie, booga, boogARrHhh"
- Joshua

I guess i expected more from You. You, whom these years have engrained into my life and heart. You, from whom which endless nothingness spawn away, dispent. You. Just You. But now, You are no more. No more happy nothingness. No more laughter, fun; incompare. You, with just one thought, destroyed, wrecked, wrought - all that's not. Tiny tingles, loud machinations, corrupt minds, lost souls, together we seeked a homage bordered only upon a single rampage. It may not be so, but yet, i fear it must be so. Never did i foresee this circumstance, never did court the position in awry. Cannot fathom, cannot compute. Cannot forget, cannot repudiate. Flung at but not fully appreciated - to live now in a void, vacuous state of non-being.

You, more so than He, should know me through and through. Toss, spurn, burning incredulity. I fathom not what You say, grasp not what You resent. So, have we, so long, so far, at last come to pass.. at this? Is this what You really feel? I never knew. Knew not what i did not see. Blind to facts, feigned? Or authentic sightlessness?

It was He who first represent. His stark disappointment; raw jealousy. Palpable dissatisfaction. All over what? What which was not? Yet, it is You who reacted with so must zest and unforeseen cruelty. Yes, You. To whom all else used to bear but little intolerability. Why it affects me more is hard to say. But its You, not He. Yes, You. I guess the truth may hurt at times, but You. Its You. Maybe i should be flattered, not shocked. Turn a blind eye, turn around. The tick tock tick tock .. time goes on ...

Pure rhapsody was but not so pure. Tainted only by a brittle line of shady translucency - shadows upon the door. Door, left to none, eternally as is begotten of a tangled mess of error, confusion and ambiguity. Unknowing hurt which hurts to know, an apology which will not go. Parts played, cannot negate; my blame cannot be shielded in totality. Yet, cannot be unsheathed in utmost victory. You, to whom with soft shadows appear to me, never truly unmasked. So so, what will be will be. But i expected more from thee.

As usual, clubbing with the Tooties managed to turn into a major harrowing yet hilarious affair. For some apparent reason, near death experiences always seem to happen when we're together. Always.

So we finally managed to get to China Black after undergoing a miraculous feat of 6 of us piling into my brother's car; those 5 at the back - which my brother decided could only parallel the Chinese Circus Act. Finally, the car stopped, a million people piled out, all happy as hell that we didnt have to take separate cabs, when, boom! as soon as my brother pulled away, it hit me that i had done the absolute brightest thing ever - In all the haste and excitement of shoving money and our handphones into our pockets, i had clean forgotten the all-important IC. Just bloody great. Of course Kaixuan whipped out her EZ-link pass which bore ABSOLUTELY NO RESEMBLENCE TO ME WHAT-SO-EVER. But hey, its the thought that counts.

While Slow, Kx and Shing cued up, Joan, Seng and i slinked off to eat and slack.(*points* Suckers!!) A most depressing MacDonalds' meal it was though. First and foremost, they had run out of Curry sauce..Whaaaa..?! Trying my darnest to mirror the picture on KX's EZ link card, i decided i was not happy. Seng resigned herself to her fate as i resolved to go back home and collect the offending IC. Just then KX rang shouting and LYING, might i add, that they had reached the front of the line. Of course that really didn't deter us as Joan decided she wanted an icecream.

Luckily, just as Seng and i were leaving, my brother(yes, he was finally useful) called to ask if everything was alright and when i complained to him about my predicament, he told me he knew the Door Bitch. Filled with hope, we rushed in to check it out. Unfortunately, the Door Bitch couldnt do anything because the Security Check wasn't done by her. Yet, as luck would have it, Seng in her own ridiculously "devious" way, managed to dig up something else - that EZ link cards would not suffice either. So i wasn't the only one who was screwed!! (Well, at least i had comrades.) So Joan and Seng had to get their ICs too. Imagine if we had gone all the way back to my house to get my IC and come all the way back only to find Joan and Seng needed theirs too!! *faints*

Which of course sparked off the "great taxi search". Joanie threw herself - and i mean she threw herself - into a cab and decided she would not move. But the taxi uncle decided he would not move either. Till she got out of the cab that is. In fits of laughter and blind panic, we threw ourselves across the self-same road, in the way of on-coming traffic no less, a few more times. Now, its all very well to toy with death like that, but honestly, all i could think about were "my shoes! my shoes! my poor shoes!" My babies!! Only just taken out of their box, just only starting to breathe, to learn, to see, to feel. Oh! The thought still pains me so!

We finally end up running after a cab, risking our lives, all dignity and condition of MY shoes. And of course, it being us, the uncle was rather insane.

Various house pours(fruit punch vodka is really the best), martinis (lychee not apple!), shots in five parts(!?), scouring for glasses, "Edison Chen", "Jay Chou", that crazy/scary/funny guy in black, "Slow's guy", the cute snogging guy, Joanie's broken shoes, jumping in a circle, slow mo' action shots, ass slapping, lots and lots of laughter, dancing, hot bar-tenders(handphone light!) later....

***

At around 4 am, i got a taste of being a mother. Decided i will have to kill myself if i have such bad kids.. i actually boiled water, made milo and whipped up a 5* French cusine meal - instant mee, microwave style! Soccer and bridge..squeezing on my bed...a lot of ASS TOUCHING (Senggg...), and nonsense later, it was time to wake up! (Thanks guys for the note .. feel like one of those people who after having AHEM AHEM wake up to find the partner gone and with only a goodbye note!! Sniff!)

***

Coming back to my point about the Tooties, we really rock!! Never was there a blame pointed in my direction about the forgotten IC. In fact, reproachments upon themselves for not reminding me to take it were made instead. Gonna miss the Tooties when i go off...

***

Another all-nighter will ensue tonight. *gasp* Talking about that, better go meet them in case Fartz grows tired of her corner again.. heh...

I have found out how to use ripway! Hip hip Hoor-ay!



Seng, Kx and Ali - cutex modelling!



Mahjong!!! Who cheated?!



Seng the manicurist wannabe, Kx tutu duno doing what and Joanie the moron's moronic ducky hand!



Seng damn proud of her..er..self?



Ali n Joanie.. nice nails! And so innocent... Who cheated?!



Slow and ALi.. "Special" french manicure!



Again?! Slow doesnt even have nail polish to show... extra...



Nasi BRiAny's nails by Sengison..



The manicurist acting like herself



Joanie WHAT R U DOING?!!